An Anonymous sharing as told to the Testimonial Ministry
Liza (not her real name) thought it was a concert with celebrities and party people. From the outside, she saw people dancing and having fun. Little did she know that The Feast, a gathering she had heard about from a friend, would dramatically change her faith.
She found The Feast in 2012 at a perfect time, a time when she needed to hear encouraging words. The messages of the talks not only struck her but she felt God calling her home just to love her, something she was longing to feel from her mom.
Liza grew up without a personal relationship with her parents, especially with her mother. Unlike other kids, she didn’t like weekends because she’d have to spend longer hours with her mom at home. Her mom would scold her for the smallest mistake. She felt unloved. She’d see her dad only once in a while as he worked abroad as a seaman. As a result, she grew up with low self- esteem. She presented a happy front to people because her self-worth only came from others.
When she became an adult, she thought romantic relationships would fill the void. Although she did not jump from one relationship to another, she kept falling for the wrong guys. One time she had a boyfriend who was married. At another time, it was a man with kids who eventually married his partner during his relationship with Liza. She was so hurt, but didn’t know any better.
At The Feast, she found her self-worth. She joined the Intercessory Ministry as soon as she found out she could serve. She was happy with her service and her developing connection with God.
Our faith teaches us that following Jesus and choosing to turn to God does not mean you will not have any more setbacks. Although already a community member, Liza had not yet left the wrong relationship she was in. One day, she faced one of the toughest battles of her life. She found out she was pregnant and she didn’t know what to do. When she told the guy, she heard the most painful answer. Hurt, she resorted to abortion without consulting anyone. No matter how much she convinced herself, she thought she wasn’t ready for motherhood. It wasn’t something she was proud of and was too painful for her to do.
While she chose to turn her back on God and lean on her own understanding to solve her problem, God did not forsake her. After the abortion, she went back to God feeling sorry for what she did. She confessed and went back to her service with a heavy heart. She wanted to be healed so desperately but did not know where to start until one day, during a Feast activity, they were asked to open up to a group.
Her sharing started her healing. It wasn’t easy but as she continued serving and going to The Feast, her heart changed as she felt the love of God through the people around her and the activities done like the Love Life Retreat. As she accepted her past, she understood that a broken heart is an open heart. Now, she can love and accept others more because she once felt unaccepted and unloved.
They say healing is a journey and as she walked hers, she learned to forgive her mother and father. Allowing God to re-parent her was one of the keys. Although the story of her sin wasn’t something she was confident to share, the way God worked in her life gives her the courage to tell others about God’s mercy. She is now happily serving as one of the Team Heads of the Intercessory Ministry. And her self-worth? It comes from no one else but God.
Her life could have turned out differently, but back in 2014, she entered an event she thought was just a concert – The Feast.